Behind Blue Eyes

Holiday 2008

2008-11-30T21:55:00.000-08:00

This is so cliché, but the year has truly flown by! We quietly rang in the New Year with The Hart’s, shot off fireworks and got home in time to watch the ball drop… Peyton made it all the way to 11pm. No worries we’ll try again this year!

The New Year brought lots of energy to grow the basket company and focus on repeat business with realtors and financial planners. In March we were lucky to have a visit from Mom and Dad as well as Jaime. Dad and I spent a day creating a fire pit in our backyard which we’ll get a lot of use of during our picking parties. We broke up the spring with Peyton’s 2nd birthday; a toddler and toddies theme that was especially appreciated by all the adults in attendance.

In June, Jeff and I took our first adult only holiday to Ashville, NC when Mom came down to play with Peyton for a few days. We celebrated a hot July 4th with Mom at the annual parade on Whitland Ave before she headed back to normal summer temps in NS. In the meantime Jeff was diagnosed with a severe case of sleep apnea and went under the knife in July. After a speedy recovery he was back to work and organizing his recording project. The recording was scheduled to start September 2nd; however Jeff woke up that morning with a tooth ache, and by the following afternoon he was sitting in a dentist chair having an emergency root canal. To round out the “they come in threes” our sewer system completely backed up and this resulted in half our backyard being introduced to a Bob Cat!

On the other side of the coin, the CD has turned out great and we’re extremely proud of our project. Please check it out at www.jeffersonross.com. We’ve created a little label, Deep Fried Discs, to promote Jeff’s music and we’re having a lot of fun working on something together.

Peyton at 2 ½ eats like a field hand and is growing like a weed. I’m constantly amazed at what she knows and her natural ability to teach me. She loves to cook and thinks washing dishes is play time with mommy. I’m sure it comes as no surprise that she loves music and has created a little medley of Twinkle Twinkle, A,B,C’s and Ba Ba Blacksheep (they’re the same melody) on her toy piano. If you ask Peyton what she is doing, she’ll tell you “I’m doing this!” It’s all about right now, asking interesting questions and giving you answers that make you think more than the questions. She’s learning limits right now and more than testing boundaries she’s testing whether your reason makes sense… her negotiation tactics are second to none!

This fall we were lucky to have a few visitors from back home. In early October Peyton met Ruby and David, parents of my best friend from high school. She fell head over heals and made up a song about them. Dressed up as La La, (Telletubbies) a costume made by Nanna Red, Peyton met Kim, Grant, Jay and Justin… our cousins visited with us for a week and we got to play tourist as well as celebrate a sweet 16!!

We’ve just finished our Thanksgiving Day celebrations in Atlanta and already looking forward to Hanukah and Christmas that will fall on the same week this year. Peyton can’t wait to sit on Santa’s knee to tell him what she’d like for Christmas… we’re not sure where to say we’ll be but Peyton in all her wisdom said she was going to tell Santa that she’d be with mama and daddy… so there you have it. I’ll be busy the next couple weeks making and shipping baskets and looking forward to the mini vacation Jeff and I will be taking to Savannah between Christmas and New Years.

As we look to the New Year, a change in President and hopefully a change in direction, it is our wish that you find yourself surrounded by hope, love and many blessings!

From our hearts to your home, we wish you a wonderful holiday season!

Tami, Jeff and Peyton
2008

Christmas Letter 2007

2007-12-16T09:41:00.000-08:00

What a wonderful time of year to touch base with loved ones. I can’t believe another year has come and gone. If I measure it by how much Peyton has changed its hard to believe it hasn’t been 3 years.

Peyton started walking in time for Whitland’s 4th of July parade and has been going ever since. She loves crayons and bluegrass. Can say 35+ words, but it’s her comprehension that astounds me. Just the other day I asked her to pick up a piece of paper and throw it into the garbage and she did it! She’s starting the “comes mommy” and “what doing?” phrases… too cute!

We spent Peyton’s 1st birthday, Baptism and Easter in a snowy Harrigan Cove. It was great seeing everyone!!! We left Halifax for NYC and Washington DC. Both amazing cities for site seeing and eating!!! In August, we joined the Rivkin family vacation to Tybee Island and our beloved Savannah. Our condo was a short walk from the beach, which helped with the 121˚ temps. Recently we spent Thanksgiving in Naples, visiting Mom, Pam and June and testing out their new sofa bed… very comfortable!!!

This year really has been a lesson in living away. When Nanny passed in February I wasn’t able to get home. I’ll be forever disappointed that she never met Peyton. It’s made me very mindful of my roots, especially where Peyton is concerned, and to also count my blessings, as I am surrounded by a wonderful adopted family here.

On an exciting note, In August, I traveled to Edmonton to attend training for a Gift Basket company I opened October 1st. It’s a great feeling to own and operate your own business. I’ve been delivering gift baskets for the holiday season, its like delivering joy! I love it.

I’ll be thinking of you this holiday season, wishing you a white Christmas and crossing my fingers that you made the nice list!

Love and Hugs,

Tami, Jeff and Peyton

Boobalicious!

2006-06-16T20:29:00.000-07:00

OK, so I took a break from writing to have a child…

But, I was so enraged by the government’s latest project that I took a break from breastfeeding to vent!

Incase you haven’t seen the commercials, there is a new breastfeeding campaign targeted at first time preggers to “encourage” breastfeeding. The commercials show extremely pregnant woman doing extremely dangerous stunts like mechanical bull riding and log running with bold captions that imply you wouldn’t endanger your child like this before he’s born so why would you afterward by feeding him formula.

This campaign is a waste of money that can only isolate and further depress the women who choose (because they live in a free country) not to breastfeed. Besides the fact that our milk doesn’t always come in, that we don’t always have enough, and that we may not want to… breastfeeding takes dedication on both the parts of the mother and child and sometimes it just doesn’t work.

These dollars could have been better spent on a campaign of commercials to encourage the social acceptance of public breastfeeding. Woman are back to work in this country long before the “please breastfeed for 6 months” are up. There needs to be more awareness and help for the working mom, the shopping mom, and the “I’m allowed to leave my house” mom.

I personally hope to breastfeed my daughter until she’s 6 months… maybe even longer. I love the experience and the bonding time is amazing, but I don’t always have enough milk to pump and she doesn’t always take a bottle. Sometimes I feel like my choice to breastfeed means staying home for the next 4 months because I may get caught in public with a hungry baby.

Most pregnant mothers I know or knew make choices about breastfeeding somewhere in the 9 months of reading everything they can get their hands on. It’s 2006 we are informed women who go to our doctor appointments and ask questions… and if women are not doing this than we have an even bigger issue than breastfeeding!

And, one more thing… kudos to Harris Teeter who offers pregnant women and new moms special parking. It’s just a little something that makes this new hectic life easier!

That’s what’s going on behind these blue eyes…

10 weeks... 10 yards...

2006-02-12T08:14:00.000-08:00

Along with an estimated 143.6 million American viewers I watched the Super Bowl. That’s 20 million (123.5) more than voted in the 2004 Presidential election*. I have to admit I wasn’t that impressed - All these well paid men working hard to move a football 10 yards for their first down. I understand the obstacles they face because in 10 weeks I’ll be required to move something the size of a football (if I’m lucky) about 6 inches to meet my first child!!! And let me tell you, that’s an expensive 6 inches. Kind of makes me wish labor was a sport that offered sponsorships… maybe I should contact Gatorade (for every thirst… there’s a flavor) … I hear its perfect to help balance the electrolytes during labor… or Snickers (not going anywhere for a while) or my personal favorite FedEx Ground (the world on time). I could use a FedEx Ground sticker as my focal point during contractions… what a commercial opportunity!

In all honesty I’m really looking forward to the labor and delivery and bringing home baby! We’re all doing great! At 30 weeks Peyton is roughly 15 inches in length and weighs a little over 3 pounds, she’s probably slightly bigger since she measures a week ahead (they haven’t changed my due date yet). My total weight gain has been 18 pounds. I’m experiencing no problems with sugar or swelling but recently started iron supplements – I think a steak dinner is on the menu for Valentines. Peyton is positioned with her head down and her legs and arms on my right side causing me to look a little lumpy at times. I really can’t wait to meet her!

The nursery is almost finished – just a few things to paint here and there. We’ve used ‘under the ocean’ colors – shades of blues, greens, yellows and purples. I won’t be able to take her to the ocean as often as I’d like so we thought we’d bring the ocean to her.

It hasn’t been all work… I’ve read a bunch since the holidays and have few favorites to share with you:

Freakonomics: A Rogue Economist Explores the Hidden Side of Everything by Steven D. Levitt and Stephen J. Dubner.
This book hits on some fascinating topics while melting the lines between economics and our everyday lives. It’s a funny easy read that opens your mind and challenges the way you think about the world around you.

The Martha Rules: 10 Essentials for Achieving Success as you Start, Grow, or Manage a Business by Martha Stewart
You should probably be a bit of a fan to read this book – I LOVED IT! I felt like I was reading a letter from a mentor. It was insightful, asked challenging questions, and was full of inspiring stories and anecdotes. The perfect book for someone looking to apply the entrepreneurial spirit to what they do!

Ellen Foster by Kaye Gibbons
A must read! Ellen Foster (the title character) is an 11-year-old orphan with the wisdom of an old woman. Reading ‘coming of age’ stories has become a new passion of mine and this tops the list.

* Statistic information http://elections.gmu.edu/Voter_Turnout_2004.htm

A Pistol and A Butcher Knife

2006-01-12T13:00:00.000-08:00

Christmas and New Years always make me think of traditions…

I love the idea of tradition. It’s a little something we can look back on and forward to.

The Webster’s dictionary says this:
Main Entry: tra·di·tion
Pronunciation: tr&-'di-sh&n
Function: noun
Etymology: Middle English tradicioun, from Middle French & Latin; Middle French tradition, from Latin tradition-, traditio action of handing over, tradition -- more at TREASON
1 : an inherited, established, or customary pattern of thought, action, or behavior (as a religious practice or a social custom)
2 : the handing down of information, beliefs, and customs by word of mouth or by example from one generation to another without written instruction
3 : cultural continuity in social attitudes, customs, and institutions
4 : characteristic manner, method, or style

As our lives change our traditions evolve and can sometimes become something different all together. Over the years I’ve tried to create traditions, but that’s more difficult that it seems. First, it usually involves more than one person and quite frankly the maintenance is a lot of work! Establishing a pattern takes time. My mother gives us Christmas tree ornaments every year and I have ornaments dating back farther than I can remember. This year she said, “I don’t think I’ll give out ornaments.” I was appalled. I mean its tradition! But in all honestly I hadn’t thought of it as such until that moment.

I often shake my head at the traditions that cause us stress over the holidays. I think we let go a little and see what happens, instead of insisting on its completion with such force that it takes away from what it is suppose to represent. Maybe that’s what Mom was trying to do… sorry Mom! My husband and I do things a little differently around the holidays. We pick a night a few nights before Christmas to exchange our presents and to spend time with one another. I enjoy that time we make together and although it seems naughty to celebrate Christmas so early, it takes away the stress of packing the truck full of presents to turn around and bring them home again. It helps us to enjoy the holidays!

I love holiday traditions, but some of my most important aren’t wrapped up in holiday cheer. When I was little (and I must have been very little for my father’s parents had passed by the time I was 7) we spent almost every Sunday or it seemed every Sunday down in Moosehead for lunch. My grandparents were smokers. I don’t remember the house being filled with smoke, although it must have been. It didn’t matter how cold it was outside, or warm for that matter, when you entered Nan’s kitchen the heat hit you with full force. It wasn’t just the wood stove; she had some kind of energy that held that place together. As soon as our coats were off and hung behind the door, we were off on our own little adventures. You might even consider mine a job. In the drawer next to the sink was an old toothbrush. My grandmother would mix up a bowl of baking soda and vinegar and I would use the toothbrush to clean all the smoke stains off a small ceramic Christmas house. The house was red with a snow roof, had a banner that read “The Rudolph’s”, a snowman on one side and a tree on the other. It spent most of the year on the top shelve of a built in cabinet in the far TV room. Once I finished, I was given the opportunity to plug the house in, every window and tree decoration shined from the little light inside. After my Nan passed, that little house was given to me. I’m not sure if the family knew what it meant for me to have it… but to this day its something I treasure and because of it have deep seeded memories of my grandparents.

Jay, my husband’s brother must have had a similar experience with his Aunt. For every time he visited, she would give him two very special ‘toys’ to play with, a pistol and a butcher knife. Jay would take off into the ever-changing landscape of his Aunt’s yard to make believe with two very real toys. When an older Jay visiting his Aunt happened to mention the pistol and the butcher knife, his Aunt was heartbroken to have to tell him that during a break-in both the pistol and the butcher knife were stolen. Both Jay and his Aunt grieved over the loss, most likely recognizing the bond it gave them. It wasn't too long after that visit that both Jay and his Aunt would pass away. I’ve never met these two people, but I love this story so much I insist on hearing it over and over. To me, it reeks of tradition.

It is my wish for 2006 that we’ll all be mindful of the traditions in our midst.

It's A Girl!

2005-12-08T15:19:00.000-08:00

Jeff and I started our 2nd year wedding anniversary with a 9am ultrasound appointment.

The routine scan is done mid-pregnancy to check for growth and certain abnormalities. For 45 minutes we watched our child dance and wave on the monitor. She looked perfect! I was over come with emotion watching her and seeing the expression of amazement on Jeff’s face. The nurse kept trying to get the baby to move in a certain direction, but she’d have none of it. I guess she’s going to be stubborn like her momma!

We were on cloud nine when the Doctor came in to burst our bubble. He was concerned about extra fluid he saw around the baby’s heart and a brand new set of tests were ordered. Much of the blood work focused on viruses we adults come in contact with but may never have a reaction to… however, they are very serious to a fetus especially in the first trimester. We were worried about Sterling, although I haven’t changed the litter box since we found out I was pregnant, I may have patted him and forgot to wash my hands. Toxoplasmosis is a parasitic infection that can be acquired by the mother from an infected cat, by drinking unpasteurized milk and most commonly by eating contaminated meat. Another worry was that I’ve never had the chicken pox (varicella-zoster virus) and that I may have come in contact with the virus while on the flight from Paris.

It was a long two weeks, making our trip to Europe seem like years ago. Fortunately the texts came back negative, and this past Monday we had another ultrasound, a specialized fetal echo cardiogram that took a very close look at Peyton’s heart and showed a perfect amount of fluid in the sac (pericardium) that surrounds the heart. We don’t know what caused the excess fluid, but I’ve never felt such relief in my life when the Doctor said, “I like this!”

They never meant to worry us, just showed appropriate caution. The experience makes me feel well taken care of, and that all the concerns I had and precautions I took during the first trimester were valid and reasonable.

These days I’m feeling her move… she’s getting big and measuring about a week further along than the due date. I’m on track with about an 11 pound weight gain and enjoying people noticing that I’m pregnant… especially when I’m waiting in a line and someone gets up to give me their seat. The pregnancy books tell me that she can hear my voice and that the music I play her now will most likely sooth her once she’s born. No need to worry I’ve put away my hair bands from the 80’s collection… for now!

I have found what I think is the most perfect book for pregnant woman who haven’t had a child and want to know the dirt we’re too afraid to ask…
"The post~pregnancy hand book" by Sylvia Brown
I’ll let you know how accurate it is in another 5 months!

I see London, I see France...

2005-12-08T13:56:00.000-08:00

A trip to Europe involves planning, currency exchange, learning bits of an old language and a general "what to do while you're there" research. Undertaking a trip to Europe while pregnant involves a keen sense of adventure.

Getting to Paris that first travel day was a bit ambitious. I’m not sure how many of you are aware of this, but when a pregnant women or someone with the tendency to suffer from blood clots travel they should wear “compression” hose while flying. Imagine putting on tights from the closest of a 4 year old and wearing them for 10 hours… imagine trying to be polite the whole time! Anyway, we arrived in London and immediately (we had a 3 hour layover – totally my fault) left for Paris. The 3-hour train, some of it under the English Channel left me hardly able to keep my eyes open when we rolled into Gare du Nord. However, once we arrived at the hotel we dropped our bags, strapped on our cameras and stepped into the city of lights with as much excitement as a children on Christmas morning… (And probably with as much sleep!)

Good friends from other areas of France and Germany met us in Paris and we celebrated by eating at two fantastic bistros. Chez Allard (41, rue Saint-André-des-Arts) with lace curtains, brass fixtures and white tablecloths showcase an old-fashioned and very romantic atmosphere. The cuisine is a traditional French Bourgeoisie style. I’d recommend anything on the menu but start with the escargot! La Fontaine de Mars (129, rue Saint-Dominique) had a very different décor and energy. It was informal and charming with checked tablecloths, an outstanding staff and an incredible South West France menu.

Paris is probably my favorite city in the world... I love putting my hands on the
individually placed stones of the Notre-Dame Cathedral and feeling that I’m standing in the middle of history. Someday I plan to climb the 400+ stairs and see the gargoyles up close and personal!!! My highlights were seeing a few places I hadn’t been before. I was awe-struck when I saw the stained glass windows in La Sainte-Chapelle, thrilled to see a lit-up Paris sprawled out before me from the Eiffel Tower, and wondered what “The Thinker” was thinking at the Musée Auguste Rodin. Of course we also enjoyed some of our favorites like Musée d’Orsay, Jardin du Luxembourg and Basilique du Sacré Coeur.

I have to mention our hotel... Hotel des Mines on Blvd Saint Michael in the 5th arrondissment -because it was perfect! It was close to the Jardin Du Luxembourg and La Closerie des Lilas, our favorite nightly hangout. For an idea of the history and vibe of the place read “A Moveable Feast” and “The Sun Always Rises” by Ernest Hemingway. I'd say we couldn't have stayed in a better part of town for our interests. Of course our bar tabs were more expensive than usual because water costs more than wine, but I didn’t mind paying over 5 Euros for a diet coke if it meant being able to soak up the atmosphere for free!

My Favorite Paris Highlight
Public toilettes… on almost every corner of the city. For 40 Euro cents you never have to worry about “holding it”. That may not be so important for the regular traveler but for this pregnant traveler it was a miracle!

Two Pink Lines

2005-10-13T13:59:00.000-07:00

This has been a hard blog to write, although I find myself an open book when it comes to my opinions… when describing my personal feelings words seem to elude me. And that’s exactly what these last 3 months have been, a journey through a vast array of emotions. When we decided we wanted a child of our own we started on a very humbling path. We learned quickly that you can plan all you want, but Mother Nature is going to decide when the time is right and for that you just have to wait. Maybe that’s the first lessons in parenting… you really don’t have control over everything!

It’s hard to believe how much rides on seeing two little pink lines in a tiny display window but the world stops when you do. I remember thinking to myself (as it was very early in the morning) not to wake Jeff, but I promptly walked into the bedroom and said “hey wake up, we’re pregnant!” Seeing those two pink lines was a shock, like winning the lottery… you may play every week but who expects to win! It was truly amazing to stand in the very moment when I realized all my dreams had come true.

Right now I’m about to start my second trimester and feel fantastic. I’m blessed and haven’t had any morning sickness. I am however; constantly amazed at the amount of fluid my body is able to process, especially during the night. Getting enough sleep is near impossible but lately I find my energy picking up and I’m looking forward to fixing up the baby’s room. Jeff endures 1st class mood swings and I endure all the horror stories and advice that comes my way – I feel its an even trade!

They say by the start of the second trimester your body adjusts to all the raging hormones and the next three months are for gaining weight. I won’t have a problem there. I’m hungry all the time. It’s a funny kind of hunger it almost hurts! As for cravings I don’t have much of that – I’m sort of having anti cravings. I used to love and enjoy 3 cans of diet coke every day and now I’m not interested. I did experience one craving though, and I’m sad to say it turned me into a mad woman. I looked at Jeff one night and said, “I need a frozen chicken pot pie!” I hadn’t had one in years, I didn’t even know if they still sold them but off I went to the local grocery. I walked in the main doors, looked at the cashier and yelled, “Where is your frozen food section?” I started to panic when I walked by 3 freezers with no pies and then a burst of light came from the heavens (or maybe it was the florescent lights) and there it was, a .79-cent frozen chicken potpie. I swear I’ve never eaten anything that tasted so good.

In case you’re wondering:
§ The only natural birth I’m planning is one where my bikini line doesn’t get shaved, you can hook me up to the pain relief as soon as my toes start to curl
§ We don’t know the sex of the baby, but plan to find out around the 20th week.
§ The names we picked out are Wesley Ernest (boy) and Peyton Ann (girl)
§ We are taking our last hurrah as a couple to Paris and London this fall
§ The due date is April 16-19th

Other than that I’ll have to keep you posted!

Head Over Heels... Sort of!

2005-08-12T09:34:00.000-07:00

A few weeks ago I attended a pool party at a friends house. Waiting my turn for the diving board, my friend (who was standing on the diving board) turned to me and said, “I really want to try a flip”. “Try it”, I said “I used to do them off the side of the pool all the time.” After assessing that situation we decided the diving board was a better option and that I should I go first. I stepped up to the diving board with all the confidence of someone who knows they can accomplish what they are about to do… I jumped high off the diving board and landed square on my back into the water… did I mention the last time I tried this stunt I was 15!

Yes my friends, the memory of being able to do it wasn’t nearly as clear for my body as it was my mind. Naturally that didn’t stop me from giving it a few more tries, but alas I think it might be better for me to just hold onto the memory!

It’s these little moments that teach you what time is really counting – distance. The distance between now and then!

I’d love to hear your own stories of this realization. You know, that moment when a teenager looks at you and says, “I really like that coat… my mom has one just like it.”

Reading Picks:
I’m still really into mysteries… good mysteries. They are perfect for summer reading. My recommendation this month is for Patricia Highsmith, author of The Talented Mr. Ripley and many other Ripley stories.

Sweating the Small Stuff

2005-07-15T09:08:00.000-07:00

Hello, my name is Tami and I sweat the small stuff!

I understand it’s an addiction mostly because I enjoy it so much. I spend hours a day creating worse case scenarios so I can spend hours a night creating exit plans. I currently have an exit plan for every room in my house that has been carefully and flawlessly executed… in my head.

I spend too much time thinking about tomorrow, sometimes forgetting about my “to do” list for today. I’m concerned that if I don’t do everything on my “to do” list that I’ll turn into a procrastinator. The last thing on my “to do” list is to make a “to do” list for tomorrow.

I worry that after my death my journals will be discovered and all honorable mentions will come and desecrate my grave… so I refuse to be buried. Instead I’ve given up all cigarettes and alcohol in an attempt to live forever. Of course a person such as myself always has a plan B.

It’s in my biological make-up to worry about the most insane things. I come from a long line of small stuff sweaters. For a while I tried to kick the habit. Invested in all the latest fads and read a library full of self-help books. I basically discovered that I’m a junkie who’s always looking for her next fix. I’ll even take a huge problem and break it into small parts not so it’s easy to solve, but so I can savor the sweating of each individual piece…

Today I am giving notice that I have fallen off the wagon and have embraced my addiction… yes I sweat the small stuff but I think its just a symptom of a skilled problem solver!

Recommended Reading:
I've been enjoying reading about the Mayfair Family Witches, an Ann Rice series I missed during my horror phase... however my recommendation takes another avenue.
The Traveler's Gift: Seven Decisions that Determine Personal Success - Andy Andrews
It allows us to follow David Ponder on a miraculous journey through time as he meets with some of the greatest minds in history. It's a quick read, inspiring, funny and insightful.

Safe Travels,
Tami

Why do you keep calling me?

2005-05-25T12:34:00.000-07:00

Why are some telemarketers unbelievably horrible at their job?

A few months ago I got a call AT WORK asking me if I’d like a quote for health insurance.
“Yeah, sure” I said, after all who isn’t looking to reduce their monthly costs. I gave the caller a few details, hung up and started calling other companies to do a little research on my own.

The other day the original company calls. Immediately a booming voice comes across my speaker.
“Hi this is (so and so) from (so and so), what is your marriage status? And how old are you?”
“Weird way of asking me out” I say with a polite little laugh.

Its important to be nice to people just doing their job. I feel hanging up on a telemarkers is as rude as not leaving a tip in a restaurant. So I always give them a shot.

“I’m calling to provide you with a health insurance quote” he says
“Oh, I’m not interested” I say “But thanks for calling”
“Well it says here you’re expecting our call, if you could just tell me what your marriage status is? And how old you are? I can provide you with the information promised a few weeks ago.” he says
“Thanks for calling, but we’re not interested. We went with someone last week” I say, a little stern, but calm.
“So I guess you don’t want us to save you some money?” he says a little too sharp, as if he couldn’t believe what I was saying.
“That would have been nice, if you’d have gotten back to me at least two weeks after your original call, I’m busy and I don’t have time to discuss this further. Thank you for calling.” I say
“You don’t want us to save you money?” He says again curtly. And this is where I lost it.
“Thanks for calling, goodbye”

Who trains these people? I hope the call was being recorded for quality assurance. The most important part of sales is to LISTEN… you can’t sell me something I don’t need… And you’re not going to cop a feel… of my wallet with that attitude!

For the record I didn’t hang up, the phone slipped out of my hand and onto it’s cradle. But I left my last waitress a hefty tip. Karma you know!

Recommended Reading:
I read two books this month that will haunt me forever. Both focus on the lives of children growing up in their own world a few decades ago...
A Prayer for Owen Meaning, John Irving
The Way the Crow Flies, Ann Marie MacDonald

Thoughts...

2005-05-06T19:15:00.000-07:00

From a wanna-be mom on mother's day

I love projects! I love planning out all the details and organizing the who's and the what's. I enjoy reading everything I can about my latest interest and I love sharing everything I learn with my friends. I'm skilled at note taking and a master of the to-do list. So when we starting planning for a baby I was surprised to learn that getting pregnant isn't always as easy as our high school teachers led us to believe. In fact it can take a lot more than planning, it can take a miracle.

The minute I started thinking about wanting a child I found myself surrounded by pregnant women. First it was just the women at the grocery story, then it spread to my friends and now when I leave the house - I see them everywhere.

My friends tell me that the minute I find out I'm pregnant my world will change and my head will fill with "crazy" thoughts and ideas. Right now I'm hoping that all the magic of my mother's knowledge will pass onto me. Like most of my friends, when I was very young I thought mom knew everything. When I was a teenager I thought mom knew nothing Now every time I try to fold a fitted bed sheet I think she is a genius.

My mom is my hero! She is fearless in the pursuit of things that amuse her, and I love that about her. Her glass is always half full, she always sees the silver lining and she never takes herself too seriously. She is a shining example of what I hope to be.

Happy Mother's Day Mom!

Recommended Reading:
In honor of my mother's maiden name, No Great Mischief by Alistair MacLeod
For those fellow wannabes,
Belly Laughs - The Naked Truth about Pregnancy and Childbirth by Jenny McCarthy

The New 20!

2005-04-07T11:13:00.000-07:00

As I face down the last days of my 29th year I find myself - excited!

Accomplishments, I’ve had a few… In fact it seems almost impossible that so much has happened in 10 years. The gap between 19 and 29 isn’t near as large as the one between 9 and 19, (remember that one!) but making a mark on the world presents it’s own little set of challenges.

Turning 25 was a tough year. I felt like the world was doing back flips and I was standing still. In this era of super stardom it was hard to know where to stand at 25. For me it was the year I realized I wouldn’t be the best anything ever, and learned how to except it so I could find some peace. I would come to find out that I wasn’t the only one who was feeling the pressure to reach an over the top success. A lot of us were feeling unable to find a foot hold in a world where Britney Spears was maximizing her earning potential at 19, and dot com billionaires were retiring at the same age we were and still trying to figure out what we wanted to do with our lives. Having a birthday was enough to put me in black and carry around a box of tissues. I felt mocked by my age, another year older, another year further from a goal I couldn’t define.

Then a brilliant thing happened. I turned 26…

You can package wisdom, and perspective in a wonderful cover and sell it in every self-help aisle from here to the moon, but until you face that you know what you want and probably know how to get it and at least give it a try, you’ll always wonder why you’re not…, instead of why you are…

I guess every age has it’s own set of dilemmas and worries. As I become older I hope I always remember how out of touch I felt at 25 and that when I hear someone struggling I’ll temper a hopeful response with both wisdom and sympathy.

And about turning 30… I’m not worried. I hear it’s the new 20!

Recommended Reading:
Gospel: A Novel by Wilton Barnhardt

The Tug

2005-02-17T15:48:00.000-08:00

As a new permanent resident of the United States I find myself in a mixing pot of emotion. Being a permanent resident doesn’t mean I can vote, but it does mean I can pay taxes, so I try to have opinions and not complaints...

When I left my “home and native land” and moved here I was boiling over with excitement. The possibilities seemed endless, and I was captivated by all of them. But then I felt the tug, much like that of a child on a parent’s sleeve, constant and relentless. Its strength is at its peak when I’m told I must earn the right to my opinion, or when my knowledge of this country is challenged to make an improvable point.

8 out of 10 people I speak with falsely believe that if a foreigner marries an American they are automatically given citizenship.

Here’s how it really works:
• Your American spouse to be files a petition on your behalf.
• About 6-9 months later you receive notice of approval or decline.
• 3-6 months later you are requested to visit the American Consulate in your native country to confirm approval of a Visa – you must take with you a completed check list that includes a full “take it all off including your socks” physical.
• On that day you’ll receive your K-1 or fiancée visa.
• From the day you cross the border into the United States on your visa you have 3 months to get married and file all your paperwork, if this doesn’t happen you can be deported.
• About 1 month after filing you’ll receive notice that your status is “pending” and you can expect an interview in 18 months.
• In the meantime you must file yearly renewal forms in order to work and travel out of the country and return to a pending status. If this doesn’t happen you can be deported.
• Once you have your interview you receive a temporary “conditional” Green Card good for 2 years. The conditions are that you remain married, and that your petitioner doesn’t die. If that happens you can be deported.
• After two years you can apply to have your conditions removed and you’ll receive a regular 10-year Green Card, which incidentally is pink.

That’s 2.5-3 years from petition to conditional green card, with lots of form filling, check writing, police reporting, photo taking, plane flights, road trips, and red tape. All of it necessary to protect you and me… but surly I’ve “earned” the right to the first amendment.

It’s in defending my own opinion that I realize I’ve arrived. I’m not always correct and sometimes I’m offensive, even loud… but I am living the American Dream. I’m working and living hard, I’m half of a wonderful family, and I can see the horizon clearly. I’m proud of my past and who I was, and I’m proud of my future and who I’ll become. And the tug, it will always be there to remind me I belong where ever I am and where ever I was.

Recommending reading:
The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri
Wicked – The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West by Gregory Maquire
The Bill of Rights & The Constitution Amendments 11-27 www.archives.gov

Finally Ready for the New Year!

2005-02-04T18:35:00.000-08:00

The first month of a new year… sounds like it should be the most motivating. Really, I think we should save New Year resolutions for February and leave January to what it’s truly for. Procrastination!

I did manage an interesting horoscope. It told me I should “think globally, and act locally”. I like that. Focuses my responsibility to things I can have an impact on. Like involvement with the Lisa Ross Parker Foundation. Please check out the website at www.lrpfoundation.org. I think it’s the best one I’ve done so far.

January was pretty quiet. Sterling did learn how to play though. Amazing really! He chases a little toy mice around. It only took him 10 human years (do cat’s celebrate cat years?) to figure out he’s a cat. Although, I have to say I think he has also learned how to say hello.

We did take the Grand Ole Opry cruise to the Bahamas, St. Thomas & St. Maarten. It was nice to be in warm weather, but honestly I was happy to spend a week close to the ocean. Being land locked too long does something to the salt in my blood. I loved St. Maarten. We sat in little sidewalk cafes and pretended we were french.

I have two picks for you this month:

1. Wicked The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West – Gregory Maguire *** It’s the story of The Wizard of Oz told by the Wicked Witch of the West – I LOVED IT!

2. The Amateur Marriage – Anne Tyler *** Having had an amateur marriage myself I could really relate to the characters. A wonderful read.

Happy resolution keeping!

Tami

New Year's Eve

2004-12-31T08:04:00.000-08:00

A time for reflection, a time for hope… 1 year, 12 months, 52 weeks, 365 days, 8,760 hours, 525,600 minutes, 31,536,000 seconds… we all get the same amount of time…

My heart is breaking for the people of Asia. It’s un-comprehensible the amount of death and destruction they have witnessed. Let me put it into perspective. Halifax, the capital of Nova Scotia and my home and native land has a population of 277,000 and the municipality has a population of 360,000. The current death toll is 120,000. Can you imagine losing 43% of the people surrounding you today? It’s inconceivable.

I feel blessed to have spent the holidays surrounded by friends and family. It’s only been a few years, but we’ve already fallen into the steps of tradition. Even as I write this, our cousin’s are on route to spend new years with us… something they’ve done for the last three years. There is something about traditions that seem solid to me. I think we put extra effort into making them happen.

Sterling is doing well as a house bound cat. He gets a little cabin fever every now and then and takes to running circles around the house, but that’s normal… isn’t it? We bought a wicker chair and he uses the holes on the sides to jump into it. Every now and then he gets stuck… I’ve walked into the living room to see his head and front legs through the hole and his hind legs stretched out to the floor. I try to help but I think I scare him with my laughter!

My pick of the month is… a commercial! Gibson had a great commercial this year, where a father quizzes his daughter about famous guitar players in order to prep her to go shopping with her mother. I thought it was awesome!

Well, I hope Santa was good to everyone and that you’re all excited for the New Year! I wish you all many blessings…

“May I enjoy happiness and the root of happiness. May you enjoy happiness and the root of happiness. May each of us equally enjoy happiness and the root of happiness.”

Cheers!
Tami

Ross Report

2004-12-06T12:20:00.000-08:00

Are we all ready for the holidays? Funny thing about it, is it will come whether I'm ready or not!

November proved to be a busy month. It was great to get home for a few days, even with the storm... Which I had nothing to do with! I'm sorry I didn't get to see everyone, but I'm thrilled I got to make snow angels and build a snowman with Carmen and Carlee. Something I'm sure I won't have another chance to do this year. "sound of me knocking on wood"

The weather has dropped here, which can only mean one thing. That's right, my furnace doesn't work. It's not so bad, the gas company plays Charlie Brown music while I'm on hold... Oh the joys of home ownership!

Sterling is mending well, and insists on proving it, by jumping on EVERY piece of furniture we own. I won't let him outside and he isn't taking that very well. He has learned to open up a window and just sits there watching the birds. I think he's mocking me.

Thanksgiving was great. I had a wonderful time with my mom visiting for the holidays. Not to mention Donna, Jaime and June who dropped in on the way to Florida. Driving down really puts the distance into perspective. Especially around the holidays. I'll be spending Christmas/Hanukkah in Atlanta this year. So to all of you close and dear to my heart, "I'll be home for Christmas, if only in my dreams... "

Wishing you all a wonderful holiday season. See you in the New Year!

Hugs Tami