The Tug

As a new permanent resident of the United States I find myself in a mixing pot of emotion. Being a permanent resident doesn’t mean I can vote, but it does mean I can pay taxes, so I try to have opinions and not complaints...

When I left my “home and native land” and moved here I was boiling over with excitement. The possibilities seemed endless, and I was captivated by all of them. But then I felt the tug, much like that of a child on a parent’s sleeve, constant and relentless. Its strength is at its peak when I’m told I must earn the right to my opinion, or when my knowledge of this country is challenged to make an improvable point.

8 out of 10 people I speak with falsely believe that if a foreigner marries an American they are automatically given citizenship.

Here’s how it really works:
• Your American spouse to be files a petition on your behalf.
• About 6-9 months later you receive notice of approval or decline.
• 3-6 months later you are requested to visit the American Consulate in your native country to confirm approval of a Visa – you must take with you a completed check list that includes a full “take it all off including your socks” physical.
• On that day you’ll receive your K-1 or fiancée visa.
• From the day you cross the border into the United States on your visa you have 3 months to get married and file all your paperwork, if this doesn’t happen you can be deported.
• About 1 month after filing you’ll receive notice that your status is “pending” and you can expect an interview in 18 months.
• In the meantime you must file yearly renewal forms in order to work and travel out of the country and return to a pending status. If this doesn’t happen you can be deported.
• Once you have your interview you receive a temporary “conditional” Green Card good for 2 years. The conditions are that you remain married, and that your petitioner doesn’t die. If that happens you can be deported.
• After two years you can apply to have your conditions removed and you’ll receive a regular 10-year Green Card, which incidentally is pink.

That’s 2.5-3 years from petition to conditional green card, with lots of form filling, check writing, police reporting, photo taking, plane flights, road trips, and red tape. All of it necessary to protect you and me… but surly I’ve “earned” the right to the first amendment.

It’s in defending my own opinion that I realize I’ve arrived. I’m not always correct and sometimes I’m offensive, even loud… but I am living the American Dream. I’m working and living hard, I’m half of a wonderful family, and I can see the horizon clearly. I’m proud of my past and who I was, and I’m proud of my future and who I’ll become. And the tug, it will always be there to remind me I belong where ever I am and where ever I was.

Recommending reading:
The Kite Runner by Khaled Hosseini
The Namesake by Jhumpa Lahiri
Wicked – The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West by Gregory Maquire
The Bill of Rights & The Constitution Amendments 11-27 www.archives.gov

Finally Ready for the New Year!

The first month of a new year… sounds like it should be the most motivating. Really, I think we should save New Year resolutions for February and leave January to what it’s truly for. Procrastination!

I did manage an interesting horoscope. It told me I should “think globally, and act locally”. I like that. Focuses my responsibility to things I can have an impact on. Like involvement with the Lisa Ross Parker Foundation. Please check out the website at www.lrpfoundation.org. I think it’s the best one I’ve done so far.

January was pretty quiet. Sterling did learn how to play though. Amazing really! He chases a little toy mice around. It only took him 10 human years (do cat’s celebrate cat years?) to figure out he’s a cat. Although, I have to say I think he has also learned how to say hello.

We did take the Grand Ole Opry cruise to the Bahamas, St. Thomas & St. Maarten. It was nice to be in warm weather, but honestly I was happy to spend a week close to the ocean. Being land locked too long does something to the salt in my blood. I loved St. Maarten. We sat in little sidewalk cafes and pretended we were french.

I have two picks for you this month:

1. Wicked The Life and Times of the Wicked Witch of the West – Gregory Maguire *** It’s the story of The Wizard of Oz told by the Wicked Witch of the West – I LOVED IT!

2. The Amateur Marriage – Anne Tyler *** Having had an amateur marriage myself I could really relate to the characters. A wonderful read.

Happy resolution keeping!

Tami